Tuesday, December 30, 2014

all the annoucements

So, the every other day bonking sessions don't seem to be working for us.  Two coffee group members are up the duff after only trying 2-3 months.  What is wrong with me?!  We have been trying 6 months so i go to the doctor.  What is the deal, doc?  Evidently, couples of our age should expect it to take up to a year.  Relax, it will happen, keep trying.  If it doesn't in 6 month time, we'll order some tests.

All was ok though, there was only lady in the group who wanted a big age gap between her kids and wasn't trying until her kid was closer to the age of 3.  So, the pressure was off, it will happen, her and I will be pregnant together and it will be awesome.  Our fertility schedules were even at the same time.  We were on the two week wait together.  I remember it vividly, at the zoo.  It was brought up by one of the others how it was going, i looked at her and she was blushing.  First month success!  Whilst i was very happy for her b/c i love her it was a huge blow to me.   All of a sudden i felt like the barren outsider.  I was the only non-pregnant person in the group.  Literally EVERY other person had a baby growing in their belly.

But, i put on a brave face and got through that day at the zoo.  Then, in the car on the way home i cried.  I think it was the first time i cried about this baby shit.  For the first time fear set in that I was going to miss the second baby bus.  For the first time i feared that i may only have one child.

I am thankful that one coffee group member was going through the same deal as myself.  Though she moved to another town.  Her and I bonded over the horror of this not being able to get pregnant stuff.  I think our bond is deep, as the pain felt with secondary infertility can't be explained in words.  As much as I absolutely hate that my dear friend has gone on this journey with me, on the other hand, I am so thankful to of had her in my life.  The bond and friendship and challenges, little did we know, would carry on for years.

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